11:46 pm
24 October 2016

Our favorite 13 ridiculous quotes from Jacob Zuma, SA president

While old JZ hasn’t always made that much sense in some of his ramblings — think, ‘dogs aren’t for africans’ –, we must admit it’s been ever so amusing.

Here are our favs.

When asked about the arms deal

“What is the problem?”

His views on Bob Mugabe

“…The people love him. So how can we condemn him?”

The ANC vs the SA constitution

“The ANC is more important than the Constitution.”

“the Constitution is only there to regulate matters.”

One of our favs, when asked how long the ANC will rule

“The ANC will rule South Africa until Jesus comes back.”

His views on homosexuality

“Same sex marriage is a disgrace to the nation and to God. When I was growing up, ‘ungqingili’ — homosexuals in Zulu — could not stand in front of me, I would knock him out.”

Global disaster, a true classic when asked about HIV/Aids

“a shower would minimise the risk of contracting the disease.”

When asked whether the arms deal could have been corrupted

“It’s just a figment of the imagination.”

He also seems to believe SA is safer than it looks

“Our media, which is very open and report on really everything, tend to exaggerate the crime issue…This is why one gets the impression that we have much more crime than other countries.”

Divine providence?

“God expects the ANC to rule this country because we are the only organisation which was blessed by pastors when it was formed. It is even blessed in Heaven. That is why we will rule until Jesus comes back. We should not allow anyone to govern our city [Cape Town] when we are ruling the country.”

When asked whether people should be held accountable for their actions

“No one person can be above the ANC. He can’t be.”

Apparently the ANC is a one way ticket to heaven

“Those who vote for the ANC will be blessed on earth and heaven”

When asked whether ANC members should be in charge of independent institutions

“…having a member who serves in the Government and who also belongs to the structures of the party does not retard this particular objective the separation of party and state. It does not.”

Finally, when he was asked whether he is a crook

“Me? Well, I don’t know, I must go to a dictionary and learn what a crook is. I’ve never been a crook.”

There you have it, el presidente serves as a stark reminder of just how serious our current leadership crisis is.